I was lucky to know my grandparents on both sides of my family tree. I have memories of both grandfathers and they were both unique in their own ways. The one I lived closest to was naturally the one I spent the most time around, and he was an extremely positive, head strong individual. He and my grandmother started out as share croppers in south Alabama. He actually did walk to school, plow with a mule, and simply put, he didn’t have much time to be a kid.
He was drafted in 1942 with one child and one on the way, and left a little piece of land called Petrey, Alabama to find himself on the other side of the world fighting a war. Later on, he sold the plot of farm land they worked so hard to acquire, and moved to another town, which would become my hometown, Greenville, Alabama, to run a grocery store.
I have much more to say about by granddad in a story/screenplay I’m writing, but there’s one thing I wanted to share in this blog. Often times when he was asked how he was doing, he would reply with, “I’m here by the hardest”. That line has stuck with me my entire life. At first it kinda sounds negative or pessimistic. However, if you knew him, you had no doubt that wasn’t the case. He was one of the most positive moving persons that’s ever influenced me. He did not take no for an answer to something he was passionate about doing.
The other day I was talking with Sandi and uploading a show to my youtube page. Our guest was Billy Joe Shaver. We have so much material over the past few years too, to upload for you, and we will get that done:) Anyway, it was a great memory and a great conversation and just plain real, raw, and unfolded in such a cool way.
We were filming the show at Workplay Theater in Birmingham, and this was back in 2010 or 2011. I love WorkPlay too! It’s a great venue. I remember how the day unfolded. We didn’t know for certain that we would be able to have Billy Joe Shaver as a guest until the week before the shoot. The reason was he was scheduled to play another club in Birmingham, and the owners of Workplay, being the class act that they are, didn’t want to upstage or cause a conflict with the other club. So, we called them and simply asked if they wouldn’t mind if Mr. Shaver came over to do a closed interview with us a day before playing their club. They said it was no problem.
We did not advertise him being at Workplay at all. Zero. What happened that afternoon was just incredible. As I prepared for what I thought would be a closed door, private interview with some performance shots later, took on a whole new dimension around 5:30 pm. Folks started coming in for happy hour inside the bar area, and they just kept coming. Word at gotten out that Billy Joe Shaver was at Workplay. By the time we were ready to shoot there was a big crowd outside the doors leading into the smaller theater room. I remember sitting on the stage and everyone asking me what to do. I asked Mr. Shaver, and he smiled, then I said, “well, let them in”.
As they came in to sit down we let the cameras roll. It was one of the best shows we ever had and I was just along for the ride. I didn’t mind the audience being there. As a matter of fact, I preferred it, but I hadn’t planned on it. Consequently, the other club was packed out the night after as well, so there wasn’t a conflict on that front either.
As I uploaded the show, I began watching it and as always, I started critiquing myself. Hosting a show is very different than performing yourself. It’s a role I love, but at the same time, I’m far from perfect. It’s funny isn’t it? I can’t tell you how many nice messages I received over the years of hosting “the right place” and it meant and still means a lot to me, however, as the saying goes, “we’re our own worst critics”, and sometimes, we need to take a step back, look back, and put away the clip board of honest constructive notes, take a deep breath, soak up the memory, and say, “you know, I did alright”.
I think about that phrase, “I’m here by the hardest” and this is what it’s come to mean for me. I think that anytime you show up with your best planned intentions, do your best in that moment, then that’s the “Here” part of the phrase. It also takes a strong person to embrace the “Hard” part of life too. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING comes easy that’s worth doing. Next time you need a phrase to describe your current state of being, you might want to steal this one too. Just smile and say, “I’m here…here by the hardest!