Clara Lou Sikes was born on March 17th, 1900. She passed away December 1994. In the picture I’ve attached, she is located right behind her mother’s left shoulder ( or looking directly at the picture she is to the right behind her mother) . Her parents are dressed in black. She was my Great Grandmother. I believe she could have lived longer but after losing her son and my grandfather in June of 1993, she said, “I will not out live another child of mine”. She picked out her dress, her casket, and prepaid her funeral cost. I was really blessed to know some of my grandparents, and blessed to know her. Think of your strongest female character and add bluntness and compassion and you’ve got Mama Sikes. I bet you have a family member that resembles her too.
I think of her often but always on her birthday. Given this unique period in our life with the current situation of the coronavirus, I thought of her life in more detail.
I loved spending time with her. I was her lawn mowing service from the ages of 9-12. Daddy would drop me off with the push mower and a gas can. She lived in government housing the last 20 plus years of her life. Her husband, William Elliot Sikes, and my great grandfather, passed away in 1971. She was fiercely independent. I had the perfect gig too. It was 3 dollars a yard, and I mowed 5 of them. Plus, I got a free lunch :) That job came to an end when the housing authority started included it in their rent. My first lesson in entrepreneurship…lol
She was married in 1916, at age 16. She lived through WWI, WWII, Korean War, Vietnam, Desert Storm, 14 United States Presidents, the 19th amendment, civil rights, and countless historical events, and Yes, health epidemics. There was Typhoid Fever ( 10,770 deaths), Spanish Flu ( 675,000 deaths), Asian Flu ( 70,000 deaths), Diphtheria ( 15,520 deaths), Polio ( 3,145 deaths), and even the measles outbreak, which like some of these, lasted a few years. It lasted for a decade with a fluctuating death rate between 2000-10,000 deaths per year.
Mama Sikes had witnessed a lot. She had her opinions too. For those in my family, I know we all had our own unique relationship with her. These are some my memories. She liked to watch sports. Football, baseball, and especially golf. She told me all the time I needed to play golf because they could make money longer than other athletes. She was pretty smart. I believe she had a crush on Greg Norman. She pulled for him every time he had a chance to win. She said she liked his hats and he was very good.
She grew up in a family of share croppers in the small community of Bethel located near Glenwood, Alabama in the southern part of Alabama. She had five children. Two of them died as infants in the first two months of their short lives. Both of them were born between the years of 1917 & 1920 ( during the Spanish flu) and died due to illness. I’ve heard stories of her working in the fields while at the same time nursing her children and never missing a beat. She was a tough woman. She also managed to get through high school. Back then, that would have been through the 9th grade. I would go by regularly to visit and check on her after I was old enough to drive. I will cherish those memories and her cooking. God knows I’d love to see her again.
So, if she were alive today, what would she tell me? I’m pretty sure I know the answer to that one. Mama Sikes was certain about what she believed. She believed in God, work, faith, and she had a very good sense of humor. She was our version of “driving Miss Daisy”.
She caught rides every where she needed to go. Out of all the things she did in her life, she never drove a car. She never had a drivers license, but that didn’t stop her from telling you how to drive! My mama would take her to town, about every week to run her errands. One time she stayed at our house for a few days to recover from a surgery. She slept in my bedroom. Mom asked me to check on her before going to bed one of those nights. I had never seen Mama Sikes with her hair down until that night. As I approached the room I heard her singing softly to herself, “Amazing Grace”, and she said her prayers. I waited. Then, I opened the door to see her long white hair laying across the bed spread. I asked her if she needed anything. She said, “No, I’m fine now”.
It’s not hard to imagine what she would say and do if she were here. After all, she’s already done it. She was always looking out for children and their well being. If you were grown she’d tell you to take care of yourself and be careful. She was also proactive and tough minded. She was a doer. After all she iived through, and all she endured, I’m sure she would tell me and anyone else, “you’ll be fine now”
RIP Mama Sikes I love you and miss you!
Love you, love you Big! #staycalm #staystrong #keepthefaith